Your words have massive impact on people, use them for greatness!
Your words have massive impact on other people. They can allow you to make more sales for your business, grow your social media channels, simply get people to like you and many other things. In this article, I will give you a few words to use to become influential, and even a few words not to use…
One of the things that struck me most while planning this article was the fact that influence isn’t established by someone starting to use big and fancy words when they are speaking, but it comes from the every day regular words we use and sometimes we don’t even know it.
Let’s start by explaining three examples of words and phrases not to use…
The first word is “ALWAYS” I can think of numerous times I would be talking with someone and I would use the words ALWAYS when describing their behaviour. The word ALWAYS means 100% of the time, without fail, and when we use this word in a statement, argument, or to get our point across, it devalues our word. I found the best way to correct my use of this word was to stop and say “What I meant to say was most of the time…” and continue the conversation.
The second word is “SORRY” and I am definitely guilty of using this one. In fact, I can remember my university soccer coach stopping practice one time and telling me to stop saying SORRY in practice and in games. When we apologize too much, it become less powerful and eventually if we use apologies too much, our word won’t mean anything to people. You need to become aware of the moments you have caused and use your SORRIES sparingly, and when appropriate.
The third one is a phrase like “I WILL TRY” because when we say phrases like this, the people we are talking to walk away from the conversation not knowing whether or not we will follow through. If we want to build influence and power with others, we need to be decisive. If it is something you can do, commit to it, and if it is something you can’t, or don’t want to, tell them that. I have learned that decisiveness is one of the most attractive things to people, in relationships, business, and one of the best things you can do to build your influence.
So, what are three examples of words and phrases you should be using? We want to focus on words that empower people, build others up, and leave them feeling good about themselves, so that they will bring out the best in people.
The first word influential people use is the word “WHY” because it evokes a deep sense of purpose. I believe most people do not stop to ask themselves WHY they do the things they do. Ask a child, this is something that happens naturally, but we can easily become conditioned to stop doing this as we get older. For example, when was the last time you asked yourself WHY you were doing something. It could be related to your job. It might be related to your finances. Or it might be something else, but what was it? Let me know down it the comments what is was and how long ago you did it. Influential people ask themselves the WHY questions, but they also ask other people it as well. This opens the door to helping people understand their purpose for doing the things they do and by doing that, many are often viewed as powerful not because of any magical trick they did, but because of where you helped that person get.
The second one is a phrase like “TELL ME MORE” because it challenges the people you are talking to to go deeper and get uncomfortable and signals you are listening. A lot of people, myself included sometimes, like to stay at the surface levels of things because it is safe and comfortable, but that is not where growth happens. Growth comes from the choice of going deeper into someone’s thoughts and feelings and getting vulnerable, and people of influence are able to inspire others to do just that.
The third one is “HOW” and I choose this word because it invites the potential for a few things to happen. The first thing that happens is that you are able to hear the ideas that the person you are talking to has detailing HOW they are going to make something happen. It could be to meet a goal they have, fix something they want to resolve, or something else, but by asking this question you are able to involve the other person in creating a solution. The second thing it does it allows you to enter the conversation with some knowledge of someone’s challenge or pain points and your job is to step in and either guide the person to finding a solution, or you can use your experience and expertise to reveal a solution. By asking HOW, you are creating a platform almost guaranteed to create and build influence while empowering other people.
These are some key words and phrases that influential people use, or don’t use, in their every day speech. Your words are powerful, so use them for greatness.
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